Marital Affairs Happen To Those Who Are Unaware

by admin on 2009/07/29

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    Marital affairs have devastating effects on the people involved. People get too settled into their relationships to watch for signs of dissatisfaction and neglect. The results of an affair are deep and intense. Betrayal isn't easy to handle, and many lives have been ruined beyond repair with one instance of cheating.   

    A whole gambit of emotions are experienced when marital affairs are found out. Jealousy, shock, disbelief, betrayal, despair, and humiliation are just a few. The sacred trust that was bonded with the sexual act has been compromised, and very few are able to ever fully get it back. It's a short road down, but a long painful climb to get back up.   

    The sacredness of the marriage vows creates a bond that is serious. Every precaution should be taken in order to uphold the vows and be faithful to one another. That means you'll have to be a good listener, and be attentive to your mate's needs. And likewise your mate will need to listen to your needs and help you with them. It's a hard thing to keep a marriage going, and you have to be willing to work at it.   

    Many times things like drinking can be involved. But why are they drinking? Is it because of you? Did they drink before you met? It's a lifestyle for some of the baby boomers, and it seems to be an accepted reason in many circles for misbehaving. "Oh, I was drunk. I don't remember."   

    The injured party reflects on the why's of the situation. What did they do to deserve being cheated on. It's a tormenting time in their life. It's intense and so personal they have a hard time focusing on anything else. And once an extra marital affair has taken place, the road to recovery is hard, and many times can never be traveled all the way back.   

    A marital affair devalues your spouse in a way that reaches deep into their being. They feel less of a person because they had been seeing themselves through your eyes as a good loving companion and best friend. This betrayal rips that status right off of them, leaving them hollow and demeaned.   

    Once the intimacy has been lost, it's extremely difficult to ever get back. The visions of their partner doing things with someone else are constantly there in bed with you. Even after years of trying, with successful faithfulness, the affair will loom heavily in your spouse's heart and mind.   

    By becoming un-attentive to your spouse's subtle cries for help in certain areas, you open the door for someone who sees this need to fill it, and create a temptation for your spouse that shouldn't be there. That's why being able to openly and honestly discuss your feelings is crucial. It lets you know how things are.   

    By being able to talk open and honestly about feelings and needs, you can defeat problems before they arise. You know what your partner is thinking and needing, and if you love them, you're glad to do whatever it is they need you to do. It's a two-way street, and each has their part to play.   

    Before things end up in an extra marital affair, take a long look at your spouse, and remember all the love and splendor of your earlier times. Don't forsake the love that's been given you. It's not everyone who will love you like that, and plan a life together with you. It's not to be taken lightly. Be an equal, but never over-power, and never shut off even the slightest communications. Don't be caught unaware.   


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